So you’ve got 3 fires in your house. Which one do you put out?
The overwhelm is real.
If it helps, I’ve spent years with more than one fire to put out…
Financial hardship, fatigue, not knowing how to start or grow a business, losing loved ones, changing toxic thinking and relationships, navigating my identity as a new creation, learning to trust Jesus leading me to freedom from strongholds and demons…
Which one do you want to start with?
Let’s talk diet.
When I say diet I’m talking about food and nutrition.
This is an area of my life where I had to completely overhaul the system.
Seeing my dad die prompted a health awakening that finally removed the wool from my eyes about our food system.
The problem was I’d now go to the grocery store and feel completely stunned and paralyzed…
“Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…How can I do anything if I don’t know what food to buy? I need to figure out how to make money. I need to grieve. I need to go to the gym but I have no energy. I guess none of these things matter if I can’t eat. Maybe there’s a book I should read?”
I watched What The Health. I read How Not To Die (not fully…it’s a big book and I actually don’t read most books front to back). I read The Last Conversation You’ll Ever Need To Have About Eating. I was convinced I’d go vegan…because my roommates knew what they were doing?
Then one day it dawned on me that I could HIRE someone who could help me…
“Wait…but I don’t have mone—we’ll worry about that later.”
Enter: Helpful Registered Dietitians
I took the next step on my health journey and discovered it’s hard to be very effective (in making a grocery list?) if you’re not personalizing*…! You mean the government doesn’t know everything? And I can’t just expect results by applying anything Google tells me? Mind explosion.
What I would soon realize is that stress is cumulative. It doesn’t just happen when you get a passive aggressive email from your boss or a triggering text message. In fact, under-sleeping adds stress to your stress bucket…so does grieving…and plastics…and heavy metals…and…sorry. Is it getting overwhelming? Focus, TJ.
The point: Stress is cumulative. So, not taking care of your basic needs is not helping. Not knowing WHAT or HOW or WHEN to eat what’s right for your body and the season of life you’re in is not helping.
“But isn’t it better that I just not eat vs. eat all the things that are going to kill me?”
“TJ, not in your position…not if you’re already under-fed and under-nourished. Under-eating is just adding more stress to an already stressed mind and body.”
And she was right.
With almost every major life event happening within a 2-3 year window, my body was not happy. It had finally reached capacity. So while in a different circumstance I may have been able to get away with whatever my old food choices might have been...including under-eating…I had now come to the realization that a more personalized understanding of what I needed to be eating was also going to be key for my healing. If nothing else, I could at least put the food fire out!
So now…
Rather than standing in the nut butter aisle wondering if I should buy the organic almond butter from California for $17 or if the more local option for $14 was better…I was relieved (and less overwhelmed) because I had permission to STOP OPTIMIZING.
“TJ, pick up the peanut butter and put it in your cart. You’re not even eating.”
The lesson: Don’t optimize too early. In any situation, food or otherwise, focus on learning how to first stabilize, sustain and then optimize. That’s what I learned that week…or month…or year…or two. That’s what I tell clients.